Goal - Focus on Me

One of the most important goals I think I set was to focus more on me. I have always been the type of person to focus on others. I am a very giving, helpful person. From my husband, to my kids, to my family, to friends, to even strangers, I tend to put everyone before myself. I have a very hard time saying no and meaning it. I have a hard time cutting off people who use me. The thought of taking time for myself to focus on me invoked feelings of guilt. I almost wanted to apologize for wanting it. But then, I realized what so many people have been telling me most of my life - if you don't take care of yourself, you can't take care of anyone else. Well, my batteries are drained. My giving is giving out. I need to follow that advice and recharge on a regular basis. I need to do this for me, but I also need to do it for everyone else. So, here are the first steps I am taking to learn how to focus on myself.

- make sure I meditate and write every night

- don't ask, demand me time

- don't feel guilty for taking time for me

- don't allow other things to get in the way

- stay focused and don't be distracted by other things during this time

- write every day, even if it is just rambling

- figure out what it is that is going to move me in the directions I wan to go

- don't allow others to manipulate me and make me feel guilty

- stay grounded and centered

- practice grounding and shielding

- don't always say yes to everyone

- when you say no, mean it. Don't go back and do it anyway

- don't be overwhelmed by other people's problems

- when neccessary, stop and refocus on you

- accept what you can't change and let it go

- be realistic in your daily, weekly, monthly planning

- forgive yourself for your mistakes and move forward

- use each experience as a learning tool

- don't allow others to make you feel bad for your choices

- don't constantly second guess yourself

- don't allow setbacks to stop you

- always keep your goals in mind and keep trying

- reward yourself for goals achieved no matter how small

So these are the first steps I am trying to take in making the changes in my life. So far, in the last two days, I have insisted that one hour is mine every night. Which I have used to write, meditate and focus. And I can already say that it has made a huge difference in how I feel, and how I am acting. So far, so good.