Goal Progress - Don't Pull The Trigger

Back in the day of the cavemen, stress was important. It was a way they survived. They would have to trigger the fight or flight response when confronted by things that could kill them. These days, there isn't as much call for that. Now, maybe if I were living in a war torn nation, or maybe dangerous city streets, it would be an issue as well. But honestly, I don't. I live in a fairly nice town, in a fairly nice neighborhood, where day to day living isn't all that dangerous. Yet, I put my body through stress all the time. I allow the things I confront in my day to day life to trigger stress. Now, when stress happens, a lot goes on in your body - like in the days of the cavemen, it prepares for fight or flight mode. Which in a life or death situation, is a great reaction to have - it would often save your life. But in day to day life, probably not as essential. Probably not going to save my life. If anything, it is going to shorten my life due to the toll it takes on my body. Prolonged stress is very hard on your body, as well as causes many other health issues, and can even kill you. 

Stress can be triggered by a great deal of things - deadlines at work, problems with money, burning dinner, whatever may be. My stresses are prolonged stresses. Things that don't have quick easy fixes. But.. they also don't have to be daily stresses. I have found that I tend to get thrown into a tail spin by absolutely everything anymore. I wake up and within the hour am stressed out about something. I don't go through a day without at least once feeling out of control or over loaded. So, what triggers my stress? What makes me feel over loaded? What sends me into those tail spins? Well, on the surface, it almost makes sense, dealing with kids, pets, work, husband, friends, family, too much to do. So, you look at it and say "Yeah, I should be stressed!" But that's not the right answer. That's not the healthy answer. The healthy right answer is - how can I learn how to cope with these things every day WITHOUT stressing and losing control. So, dig a little deeper, look a little harder, and find out what those triggers are. What is it that really sends me over the edge. But more than looking for those triggers, but make changes so those triggers are not there. Now, chances are I'm not going to get rid of the kids, the pets, the husband, the job, the bills, etc. And even if I did - chances are, I would find other things to stress about. So I think I'll keep the ones I have. I'm pretty fond of the kids and hubby. So, how do I stop stressing it all? It's changing my response to those triggers. Once I figure out what it is that makes me feel all the stress, I can look for new responses to those things. 

So, let's look at one of the situations I have identified. Saturday afternoons can be crazy at my house. I usually have both sons at home as well as the cat and dog. So, one son is usually on the computer playing music. I've got another one on the game system playing a game. Then I have the dog who usually wants to go out at the worst possible time. Then if not that, she is chewing on something or fighting with the cat. Lots of noise, lots going on. I'm usually trying to clean or cook. And the kids usually want me to pay attention to them. Add in the phone, the computer, and whatever other random thing happens on any given day. My definition of it - chaos. Chaos to me equals stress. Big time stress. Once it reaches a peak, I usually end up yelling at someone. Or feeling out of control. Then I am no use to anyone. So, I know this. I know how it is going to happen. It happens every Saturday. And while I want to be home with my boys, I want to get things done around the house, I don't want the chaos. I don't want the stress. So. I've identified what happens and what it does to me. There are a couple of different things I can do. I can make changes in how things happen. And I can also change how I react to them. I haven't decided yet exactly how I am going to change these things yet. But I now know that it doesn't have to be like this. I know that in order to feel better, reduce the stress, and be happier, I do have to change things. 

So, what's the plan boss? Here is my current plan. I want to sit down and honestly look at my life, where the stresses lie. What my triggers are. Then I am going to list the changes I want to mke so that those triggers aren't triggered constantly. A chart if you will, that will plan out my new reactions to these triggers. Changes I can make so that I don't have to have those triggers. It's a double attack. Fighting stress with both barrels. I'm sure that it will be hard at first. These triggers and their reactions are ingrained. You use them like bad habits. Something happens - you respond. The same thing happens - you respond the same way. It gets to be a way of life, a normal reaction. But, it doesn't have to be that way. It can change. And then, the new, healthier, less stressed reaction will become the norm. And life gets better. I'm all for better.